Thought One
Lately, I've been out dog-walking in the "fresh" air. No, it hasn't been with my beloved Sadie. It's been Wally.Some of you may remember Wally from the past.
Wally is our daughter-in-law's dog. He's part Greyhound, and part something else. He is strong enough to move me around, even when I don't want to move. (I'm sure he could run down a fox or coyote quite easily if he wanted to.) But since A is on a course at the university, it's easier for me to walk him than for her to come home, walk him, and go back to the University. That plan makes no sense. At all.
But I also have another walking companion now. He's named Arth. (His full name is Arth Ritis, but we're not that formal.) Arth limits my walking ability when Wally and I go out. And at other times, too.
When I get home, however, some of Arth's sworn enemies come to help me. There's Mr. Ben Gay and, more commonly, Mr. Volt Arin. They rub me the right way. There's also Ms. Aceta Min Ophen. Ms. Ophen says, "Take a couple of these, and if you need more help, I'll be back in four to six hours and you can have some more of me." She's really very kind and helpful.
So, I can call on Mr. Gay or Mr. Arin, and Ms. Ophen, when I need their help. But, really, I'd rather just lose Arth. But he's made it very clear that he's going to be around for a while. Even when I'm trying to hibernate.
GRRRRrrrr!!
Thought Two
There is a video of a woman walking for hours through the streets of New York city, which shares pictures of her and any recorded conversation. I've seen the video. A number of people made very sexist remarks, which even your Bear found offensive. But other people people said a friendly, "Hello" or "Good Morning." Yet all of those encounters were lumped in as harassment. I really don't get that. (BTW, I've been looking for that video, but haven't found it again. Otherwise I would have shared it, right here and right now.)Here in Canada, we try to encourage friendliness. Indeed, the Community Association in one part of River City was encouraging people to greet one another on the sidewalks (or wherever) when they meet. I mean, really, is it so hard to say "Hello" to people you pass on the street? I remember an old saying: "If you see someone without a smile, give him (or her) one of yours." Is that so difficult?
When saying "hello" to people is harassment, it seems to me we have crossed some invisible line of what is just plain appropriate, and what is ridiculous. Too much political correctness, maybe. It seems more and more people are offended by simple, kind and well-intended things. What have we come to? Really?
But maybe I'm just being too Canadian, eh?
Blessings and Bear hugs, friends. (Unless you're offended by that.)
I saw that video, too. I didn't watch the entire thing, but I remember being verbally accosted on the streets when I was a young and lovely thing. I never minded it. It's cold where you are, too, and I find it brings Mr. Arth right out of his hibernation! :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing those thoughts, DJan.
DeleteNot so much cold as fresh, bracing and invigorating. But I repeat myself.
Blessings and Bear hugs!
I have seen the video also. The simple "hellos" or "have a nice day" were fine but many of the greetings held more of a demand that she respond or stop and talk to them. "Don't want to talk to me? Am I too ugly?" That's not just a pleasant greeting anymore. The nod and greets were just fine, to me. The ones that wouldn't leave it at that (walking alongside her for 5 minutes.. asking for her number.. etc), that's harassment.
ReplyDeleteThe dog is a beauty.. looks like maybe part border collie? Anyway, I especially enjoyed seeing the guy with the dog. :)
Mr. Ritis is a pain in the Arth! ;)
Oh, Hilary: that bit abut Mr. Ritis is so good. Because that's where he's a pain. And Wally isn't part Border Collie. I think more likely part Irish Wolf Hound of Russian Wolf Hound.
DeleteNo question that parts of the video were problematic, and down right demeaning. But the "Hellos" and the like I thought were OK.
Blessings and Bear hugs!
Wally is a beautiful dog. Getting out in the cold is not easy, that's for sure!
ReplyDeleteThe important key to getting out in the cold is to think it's not really cold. Something like "invigorating" or "fresh" sounds so much better. That I can handle; cold, not so much. It's all in how one approaches the matter.
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs!
I remember that video--I think she overdid it!!
ReplyDeleteI also think the video was overdone. It's not the kind of thing a fishducky would do.
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs, little ducky friend! (I have to be careful about your other part; I like to eat fish.)
You're not too Canadian at all. Saying hello to another human being is just plain kindness. How sad that we have to over think and over politicize everything we do.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you on that, Amanda.
Deletep.s. Love the shot of you and Wally - what a sweet pooch. And your walking companions' names are hilarious - very clever.
ReplyDeleteWally is always excited to see me — partly because I make a fuss over him when I see him, and partly because he knows I take him for a walk. It works pretty well, I think.
DeleteAnd yeah, I do come across some "particular" creatures in my travels. Glad you liked that part of the report.
Blessings and Bear hugs!
KEEP MOVING!
ReplyDeleteIt will make arth tired and he wont be such a pest. Really!
And since you get our leftovers of weather there - we are in the 30's & 40's F so we will send them to you when we are done with them...;)
I'm not so sure about your comment on Arth. I'll wait and see what he does.
DeleteAnd we're getting your used weather? Yuck! You wear it out, and then send it to us. Maybe something more interesting will move in from Alberta, instead.
Blessings and Bear hugs to you, and your collection of "livestock."
You have to be a woman to understand what we go through when one is young and has to walk through the gauntlet of men whistling, making remarks about your body, and being harassed. If they just said hello, how are you, that would be fine, but a group of men who are getting encouragement from their buddies to step over the line are beyond humiliating to woman. That woman in the video was also followed and stalked by some guy for part of her walk. It is not about being friendly, it is more about being demeaned and frightened at times. Now that I am an old bat, I don't have those worries anymore but I am annoyed and anxious that my daughters and granddaughters still have to deal with this behavior.
ReplyDeleteLike you, Bear, I live in the world of better life thru chemistry. Every day brings a new ache.
I can't speak from a female perspective, but to me much of stuff on the video looked fairly obnoxious. Not the way I raised my son.
Delete"Better living through chemistry." Great motto for some company.
Blessings and Bear hugs!
I'm sorry to hear about your trouble with Arth - and confused I was momentarily because I kept remembering my old friend Garth (whose full name was Garth Cold Nose Strong Heart) - a delightful companion who enjoyed walking, running, and visiting lady dogs on his own when they were in the mood for companionship.
ReplyDeleteI did see part of the video you mentioned, but what I also read was that it was heavily edited to avoid all the comments made by white guys. I don't know about all this stuff either, to tell you the truth. Many years ago I was a relatively attractive young woman who walked wherever I wanted to go whenever I wanted. Yes, I frequently wore miniskirts. Usually there were no remarks at all and most that were made were of the generally friendly 'hello' variety.
Strangely enough, I watched a two minute video of a miniskirted young woman who'd walked around Mumbai for ten hours getting no comments at all.
Hope your aches and pains have gone.
Garth Cold Nose Strong Heart must have been a delightful walking companion. Wonderful!
DeleteI don't know much about the video, other than what I saw. But that isn't my style of greeting people on the street. Especially women. And, No, I don't give everyone I meet a Bear hug!
But blessings and Bear hugs, susan!
Nice to see you and Wally I think it is a wonderful thing you have to do walk Wally nothing better than a reason to get out of bed and venture out into the cold. You made me laugh this morning. Take care. Bear hug B
ReplyDeletePS yes I say Hello to everyone is that really only a Canadian thing I do hope not:) Oh yes I am Canadian. Hug B
ReplyDeleteWally is fun to walk, when he isn't dragging me all over the place. Not that he does that very often.
ReplyDeleteGlad I gave you something to laugh about!. I get a smile from your pictures with your "girls" wearing their hats. The hats are not exactly Bear style, but they look very good!
Blessings and Bear hugs, Grace!
I feel your pain. Arthur-itis and his pal Ben Gay have wormed their way into our lives, too.
ReplyDeleteNo, it isn't just a Canadian thing. My hubby and I always smile and or say a cheery hello to strangers, and often strike up conversations. It doesn't cost a thing to be pleasant, and sometimes a kind word can make the difference in someone else's day. If someone is offended by simple friendliness, that someone needs a change in attitude. [A healthy attitude is contagious, but don't wait to catch it from somebody else. Be a carrier.]
Happy weekend!
What a wonderfully cheery note, Susan! Thanks so much.
DeleteI'm glad someone else chats to folks on the sidewalk. I think that's a good habit to have. And, yes, I guess you could call me a "carrier." Though I'm careful with that word; I hear it from the perspective of someone who has worked in Medical Ethics.
Blessings and Bear hugs!
Two very different thoughts. The first one gave me the giggles as I read. I like all the names and may have to borrow a few.
ReplyDeleteI'm familiar with the video in your second thought. It was shown on TV news and talk show discussions for a few days. I don't know if they edited out the guys working construction or not, but the ones talking, etc. to her as she walked by made me think that it's a shame that they are not employed. When they have time to hang out on the street, leaning against buildings as people walk by, it's no wonder that they entertain themselves by staring at women, intimidating, and harassing, which is wrong. I've experienced friendliness "and" harassment... when I was younger. :) As an "older" woman, I still get a friendly hello here and there. :)
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Anita. That video is outside my experience, as a male or a female. But some of that is not at all fun.
DeleteAnd you are not am "older" woman. Perhaps "more mature" is the best way to put it. Also, one is young until the age of 80; thereafter, one is "venerable." Please learn to use the age-related words correctly!
Regardless of your age, blessings and Bear hugs!
Glad you have a dog to keep you company even if it isn't your own personal dog. They are a blessing.
ReplyDeleteAs to smiling and saying hello, I love to drive people crazy here when I am out walking my dog. People do NOT acknowledge you and pretend you are not there. Likely ingrained over the years as a form of protection. Anyhow, I smile and say hello
Yeah, Wally is nice to have around, but he's not a cuddly kind of dog. So that is a bit of a distraction. Is Volk getting any smarter?
DeleteGlad you smile and say "Hi" to folks. I think in your part of the world, people need lots of friendliness. And who better than you to do it?
Blessings and Bear hugs!
That is nuts. I agree completely with you. Saying hello and being pleasant shouldn't ever be considered harassment in any sense of the word. I smile and strangers and acknowledge them usually...well pretty much always. That is just the way I am. Everyone could use a smile. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteI don't know whether people lack a sense of humour, or a lack of humanity. But it is sad when people get structurally adjusted (bent out of shape) by a friendly greeting.
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs, Kathy!
Rob, hoping that you and Wally will find a way to leave Arth out of your walks.
ReplyDeleteI've not seen that video of the woman walking around the City getting comments. And so I will not comment myself.
Thank you for your visits over to my place and the kind comments. I hope to actually do a post about my recent holiday very soon.
xo
Looking forward to your story, Frances!
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs!
I know those Itis boys and that Arthur is the worst of the crew. My fingers know them all too well. It's exciting that you are enjoying your walks.
ReplyDeleteA friendly "Hello" is a good way to confuse some people.
Or they think I've confused them with someone else. There is always that possibility.
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs, my lady!
Love that photo of you! Its always such an escape walking the dog isn't and chance to meet your neighbours which these days becomes a rarer thing ...especially here in the US where people drive everywhere
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jody. Ironically, I don't have to walk the dog to meet neighbours. I often walk the two blocks from our house to our son's (and grandchildren's) place. I say hello to everyone I see, and most reply with something similar. Lots of fun. Sometimes leads to a short visit over the front fence, which is delightful.
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs!
Just wanted to let you know re: gnashing of teeth. I lost my mouth guard but have another one being maden
ReplyDeleteThat's a real Bear (so to speak) mc. Really not fun at all. So sorry to hear it. Please take care!
DeleteBlessings and Bear hugs!
Good-looking cap and beard. Peggy and I now dog-sit for money sometimes. In a way, it's like enjoying the best part of having a dog and then getting paid for the privilege.
ReplyDeleteDog sitting for cash. I should have thought of that. But we have enough challenges looking after our our daughter's dogs (when she's on the road) or A's dog (Wally) when she's busy at school.
DeleteThe dogs are a bit like grandchildren. You get to play with them, then you send them home.
Blessings and Bear hugs (or whatever)!
We fell into dog-sitting when we stopped to pet a lady's blue-heeler one day, and, seeing that we were good with her dog, she asked if we could keep it on her bowling nights. We said yes, not expecting money, but when she gave us $20, Peggy refused it, so the lady then offered it to me, and I took it. Now, we're even keeping her dog when she goes on vacation, and the more attached I get to her (the dog, Sheila), the harder it is for me to take the money.
DeleteWOW! I can understand that. Hope you and Sheila keep having wonderful times together.
Delete